A Great Speech, Thank-you Congressman Boehner!
Monday, March 22, 2010
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
The Myth That This Healthcare Bill Will Help Reduce Cost
Let us be very clear, this healthcare bill WILL NOT reduce cost. President Obama and the Democrats are play fast and loose with the facts, and are merely playing a shell game. The United States Government (or for that matter, any government) is ill-equipped to provide services and goods, period. In fact, every time the government meddles in the free-market, chaos follows (remember “price control” under President Carter….how did that work out?)
A Cost-Control Mirage: Obama is telling people what they want to hear about health care, not what they need to know.
Also, there are things crammed into this bill that have NOTHING to do with healthcare:
Green Energy Schools: Funding for (high performance) green energy schools? Forget the fact we should be funding schools that perform high academically, but what does this have to do with healthcare?
Student-Loan Funding: This bill includes the complete takeover (and full funding responsibility) for all federal funding of college student loans. One, the government already screwed this program up, and once again, WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH HEALTHCARE!!!!????!!!!
We must keep push our legistaors to vote against this bill, and start over.
A Cost-Control Mirage: Obama is telling people what they want to hear about health care, not what they need to know.
Also, there are things crammed into this bill that have NOTHING to do with healthcare:
Green Energy Schools: Funding for (high performance) green energy schools? Forget the fact we should be funding schools that perform high academically, but what does this have to do with healthcare?
Student-Loan Funding: This bill includes the complete takeover (and full funding responsibility) for all federal funding of college student loans. One, the government already screwed this program up, and once again, WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH HEALTHCARE!!!!????!!!!
We must keep push our legistaors to vote against this bill, and start over.
Speech Text: You Call Healthcare Reform, I Call It Tyranny
The following is the script I used while speaking at the Americans for Prosperity event in Rochester, NH on March 16, 2010.
What a year it has been. Most of you in this room have spent the better part of this last year engaged in your government like never before.
We have had to fight so many issues, to the point of exhaustion, and no matter how hard we fight, they just keep coming. Some say it is unfortunate, that we have come to a point in our country when our representatives seem so willing to ignore, not only the Declaration of Independence and the united States Constitution, but the righteous will of “We the People……..”
I on the other hand have never been more proud of all of you, my fellow New Hampshirites, and do not look at this situation as unfortunate. Because I am going to share a little secret with you that too many in Washington seem to have forgotten, but yet each in this room knows all too well. The Constitution of the united States belongs to the people, and if those serving in our State and National capitols want to ignore that fact, then we Granite Staters are prepared to remind them.
This past year reminds me of one of the greatest clashes in our history. During the conflict at Gettysburg, standing on top of Little Roundtop, the furthest left flank of the Union Army, stood a regiment from Maine, commanded by Civil War hero Joshua Chamberlain.
The boys from Maine were the last line of defense, if the Confederates broke through there, they would overrun the rest of the Union positions.
Against overwhelming odds, Colonial Chamberlains troops pushed back wave after wave of the Confederate Army. Exhausted and out of ammo, the situation looked desperate.
In many ways that is how most of us feel today, but surrender is not an option, failure cannot not be the end result. If Congresswoman Porter and her colleagues break through on healthcare, the cause of freedom will be weaken. Because this bill is not only unconstitutional, it is un-American.
Make no mistake about it, we are in a new civil war, one without bullets, but the cause is the same………….liberty. Liberty is our unique American experience, which must include our ability to self govern and enjoy the benefits of a fair, but free market.
Thomas Jefferson said it best when he stated – “A wise and frugal government, which shall leave men free to regulate their own pursuits of industry and improvement, and shall not take from the mouth of labor the bread it has earned - this is the sum of good government.”
We live in a disciplined democracy, wrapped in the blanket of a virtue known as a Republican form of government. Today Congresswoman Porter and her colleagues are tugging on that blanket, and we must resist with every fiber of our existence, or risk exposing future generations to the oppressive elements of totalitarianism.
Whether it is an excessive tax burden against the most productive in our society, or the central mandate that dictates the purchasing of healthcare, or face a penalty that includes prison, you and I (and millions of our fellow Americans) are fighting against the soft tyranny of a 2000 page bill that puts a far off centralized government in-between you and your doctor. I call it soft-tyranny because we are not being oppressed by the bullet but by the pen, but it is tyranny none the less.
And aiding in this attack on our individual liberty, one of New Hampshire’s own, Congresswoman Carol Porter. Never in my life did I ever believe that an assault on our Constitution would be lead by a representative hailing from the “Live Free of Die” State.
But who is this Congresswoman who would so willingly ignore her employers, you and I, for a piece of legislation that would dismantle the best healthcare system in the world and replace it with Castro-care?
Congresswoman Porter has made it her legislative mission, along with Speaker Pelosi, Senate Leader Reid, and President Obama to help reshape a “new” America; an America in their own image. An image where those in Washington believe they know what is best for you, even if you don’t.
And where does Congresswoman Porter stand on these issues, when she makes it a point, along with her colleagues, that those of us who seek real healthcare cost reform are nothing more than a group who can only say “NO.” But when you look at the record, who really has been the person of “NO?
Did Congresswoman Porter reach out to John Stephen, someone who has been instrumental in helping States, including NH, deal with their healthcare issues? “NO!”
Did Congresswoman Porter reach out to sitting NH Senator, and former-NH Congressman Jeb Bradley, an individual who has worked on healthcare issues both at the State and the national level, and seek his valuable council. “NO!”
And what about Sean Mahoney, who not only wrote one of the best articles regarding healthcare reform this past year, but talks to NH business people every single day about their struggles. Did Congresswoman Porter reach out to Sean Mahoney for insight? “NO!”
And what about the small business owner, who will be greatly affected (negatively) if the current understanding of this healthcare bill passes? Did Congresswoman Porter talk with Fenton Groen, owner of one of the regions leading construction companies, who not only lives in her district, but in her hometown? Did she ask Fenton for advice. “NO!”
And what about her continents? Has Congresswoman Porter been open to your suggestions and input on this matter. “NO!”
And how responsive has Congresswoman Porter been at looking at, and embracing, free-market solutions that would have a greater impact at addressing the true concerns regarding healthcare….availability and cost:
Does Congresswoman Porter support healthcare portability; (meaning the ability for you and I being able to not have our insurance tied down to our jobs)? “NO!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support real tax-credits to individuals to help cover the cost of Healthcare insurance? “NO!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support health insurance vouchers for those that can’t purchases insurance, providing them with the ability to freely choose their own health insurance? “NO!”
Does Congresswoman Porter supported the ability for the individual to purchase any plan they want, across State lines, to help ensure maximum competitiveness (which has always helped reduce the cost). “NO!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support the ability of individuals, small business, or non-profits to combine, allowing them to negotiate as a collective (buying in quantity always reduces the cost) to buy healthcare insurance? “NO!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support the ability for individuals, interested in purchasing through a health insurance collective, to contribute additional funds, tax-free, to help those in need of health coverage? “NO!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support the ability of the individual to contribute greater sums to THEIR flex plans, tax-free, and allow those flex-plans to roll over from year to year (tax-free). “NO!”
Does Congresswoman Porter defend your individual liberty, and allow you to determine your own healthcare fate? “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”
But let’s be fair, Congresswoman Porter doesn’t always say no. For example:
Does Congresswoman support a 2000+ page healthcare bill that she initially did not read, and to date many of her colleagues still have not read? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that Nancy Pelosi recently supported by saying – “You have to wait until the bill passes to know what is in it?” “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a healthcare bill that directly or indirectly uses taxpayer dollars to fund abortion? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that will force healthcare rationing on all Americans? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that will cut $500 billion dollars from Medicare? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that would provide healthcare coverage to at least 8 million illegal aliens? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that the CBO says will raise income taxes to 43% (from 35%) on many Americans? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that will see the Capitals Gains taxes increase from 15% to 22.5%, in an already troubled economy? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that will force a $2,000.00 dollar increase in the average health insurance premium (according to Heritage Foundation based on the CBO analysis)? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that will FORCE people to buy insurance they don’t need or want that would cost over $8,500.00 dollars? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that would allow the IRS further intrusion into your life, by making them the enforcement arm to ensure that the mandatory healthcare insurance is being met by individuals? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that fines those who do not purchase health insurance 2.5% of their income? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a healthcare bill that also mandates prison sentences should an individual not purchase healthcare and fail to pay the penalty fine? “YES!”
But guess what, she will make sure you have complete healthcare coverage when you are in prison!
Does Congresswoman Porter support a healthcare bill that taxes medical devices, such as pace makers, hearing aids, wheel-chairs, and artificial limbs? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a healthcare bill that completes a government takeover and funding of all federal student-loan programs (what the hell does that have to do with healthcare?)? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that will be passed without actually being voted on? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that the overwhelming majority of her continents do not support? “YES!”
If this healthcare bill passes, with the help of Congresswoman Porter, the United States Congress will seize control of not only the best healthcare system in the world, but a free market entity that represents 1/6 of our economy.
If this bill passes, which when combined with the masses takeovers of other industries, such as the financial institutes and auto manufactures, Congresswoman Porter will be on record as to permitting the United States Government seizing close to 50% of our economy.
When a government talks about controlling the economy and business, make no mistake about it, what they are really talking about is controlling people. This is a concept our country, and most of our neighbors, are ill-prepared to handle, let alone support. And it is contrariety to the founding principles that made America the most prosperous nation on the planet.
“All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent.” – Thomas Jefferson
We cannot remain silent, and we cannot be part of a generation that allowed this to happen!
A vote on healthcare will most likely come this week. Waiting until November will not help us now. November will give us a chance to restore sensibility in DC; but today, and tomorrow, and all of the days until the next election require our vigilance.
We need to make sure that the likes of Congresswoman Porter, Speaker Pelosi, and Majority Leader Reid, feel us breathing down their necks, see us taking to the streets in opposition to bad ideas, and they need to hear us not only in resistance, but in support of intellectual solutions that serve us and not enslave us!
And how do we stay engaged:
You support groups such as the AFP, help give them the muscle to resist.
Calls are nice but telegrams, letters, and visits to our Representative offices are better! (do not go in there as a group, but go in there one at a time.
Be an advocate. Get your friends and family engaged.
Help candidates who not only oppose those representatives that support such measures as this healthcare bill, but candidates that are prepared to offer real solutions and reforms that will help New Hampshire families, and not hurt them
Support such endeavors as Frank Guinta’s healthcare petition, and Congressman Steve King’s Declaration for Healthcare Independence.
Right letters to the editor or call talk radio. Don’t insult, simply state facts.
Stay informed and be ready to engage on principles and fact. Visit sites such as Heritage Foundation and the Hudson Institute. Arm yourself with the truth, because our liberal friends know so much that just isn’t so.
In closing I want to bring you back to the beginning of my remarks. I want to bring you back to Gettysburg and Littleround Top. When we last left Joshua Chamberlain and his men they were outnumbered, exhausted, and out of ammo. The situation looked hopeless, in many ways where you and I found ourselves now.
Chamberlain knew what we know today, surrender is not an option; failure cannot not be the end result. Against all odds, Colonial Chamberlain rallied his troops and gave them the only order he could…….fix bayonets!
Chamberlain and his men did something their enemy did not expect……… they charged down that hill yelling and screaming as one united force. I can only imagine what the enemy must have thought.
When the cause of liberty needed a victory, a small band of brothers from Maine gave us one. But it was their destiny to win that battle, as it is our destiny to win this one, because they had something their enemies did not possess………. They had the high ground and they were fighting for a principle greater than themselves.
Ladies and gentleman, the opposition has underestimated your determination and your resolve. We have the high ground, and our principles are worthy of our defense. So I say to tonight…..fix bayonets ……………charge!
What a year it has been. Most of you in this room have spent the better part of this last year engaged in your government like never before.
We have had to fight so many issues, to the point of exhaustion, and no matter how hard we fight, they just keep coming. Some say it is unfortunate, that we have come to a point in our country when our representatives seem so willing to ignore, not only the Declaration of Independence and the united States Constitution, but the righteous will of “We the People……..”
I on the other hand have never been more proud of all of you, my fellow New Hampshirites, and do not look at this situation as unfortunate. Because I am going to share a little secret with you that too many in Washington seem to have forgotten, but yet each in this room knows all too well. The Constitution of the united States belongs to the people, and if those serving in our State and National capitols want to ignore that fact, then we Granite Staters are prepared to remind them.
This past year reminds me of one of the greatest clashes in our history. During the conflict at Gettysburg, standing on top of Little Roundtop, the furthest left flank of the Union Army, stood a regiment from Maine, commanded by Civil War hero Joshua Chamberlain.
The boys from Maine were the last line of defense, if the Confederates broke through there, they would overrun the rest of the Union positions.
Against overwhelming odds, Colonial Chamberlains troops pushed back wave after wave of the Confederate Army. Exhausted and out of ammo, the situation looked desperate.
In many ways that is how most of us feel today, but surrender is not an option, failure cannot not be the end result. If Congresswoman Porter and her colleagues break through on healthcare, the cause of freedom will be weaken. Because this bill is not only unconstitutional, it is un-American.
Make no mistake about it, we are in a new civil war, one without bullets, but the cause is the same………….liberty. Liberty is our unique American experience, which must include our ability to self govern and enjoy the benefits of a fair, but free market.
Thomas Jefferson said it best when he stated – “A wise and frugal government, which shall leave men free to regulate their own pursuits of industry and improvement, and shall not take from the mouth of labor the bread it has earned - this is the sum of good government.”
We live in a disciplined democracy, wrapped in the blanket of a virtue known as a Republican form of government. Today Congresswoman Porter and her colleagues are tugging on that blanket, and we must resist with every fiber of our existence, or risk exposing future generations to the oppressive elements of totalitarianism.
Whether it is an excessive tax burden against the most productive in our society, or the central mandate that dictates the purchasing of healthcare, or face a penalty that includes prison, you and I (and millions of our fellow Americans) are fighting against the soft tyranny of a 2000 page bill that puts a far off centralized government in-between you and your doctor. I call it soft-tyranny because we are not being oppressed by the bullet but by the pen, but it is tyranny none the less.
And aiding in this attack on our individual liberty, one of New Hampshire’s own, Congresswoman Carol Porter. Never in my life did I ever believe that an assault on our Constitution would be lead by a representative hailing from the “Live Free of Die” State.
But who is this Congresswoman who would so willingly ignore her employers, you and I, for a piece of legislation that would dismantle the best healthcare system in the world and replace it with Castro-care?
Congresswoman Porter has made it her legislative mission, along with Speaker Pelosi, Senate Leader Reid, and President Obama to help reshape a “new” America; an America in their own image. An image where those in Washington believe they know what is best for you, even if you don’t.
And where does Congresswoman Porter stand on these issues, when she makes it a point, along with her colleagues, that those of us who seek real healthcare cost reform are nothing more than a group who can only say “NO.” But when you look at the record, who really has been the person of “NO?
Did Congresswoman Porter reach out to John Stephen, someone who has been instrumental in helping States, including NH, deal with their healthcare issues? “NO!”
Did Congresswoman Porter reach out to sitting NH Senator, and former-NH Congressman Jeb Bradley, an individual who has worked on healthcare issues both at the State and the national level, and seek his valuable council. “NO!”
And what about Sean Mahoney, who not only wrote one of the best articles regarding healthcare reform this past year, but talks to NH business people every single day about their struggles. Did Congresswoman Porter reach out to Sean Mahoney for insight? “NO!”
And what about the small business owner, who will be greatly affected (negatively) if the current understanding of this healthcare bill passes? Did Congresswoman Porter talk with Fenton Groen, owner of one of the regions leading construction companies, who not only lives in her district, but in her hometown? Did she ask Fenton for advice. “NO!”
And what about her continents? Has Congresswoman Porter been open to your suggestions and input on this matter. “NO!”
And how responsive has Congresswoman Porter been at looking at, and embracing, free-market solutions that would have a greater impact at addressing the true concerns regarding healthcare….availability and cost:
Does Congresswoman Porter support healthcare portability; (meaning the ability for you and I being able to not have our insurance tied down to our jobs)? “NO!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support real tax-credits to individuals to help cover the cost of Healthcare insurance? “NO!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support health insurance vouchers for those that can’t purchases insurance, providing them with the ability to freely choose their own health insurance? “NO!”
Does Congresswoman Porter supported the ability for the individual to purchase any plan they want, across State lines, to help ensure maximum competitiveness (which has always helped reduce the cost). “NO!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support the ability of individuals, small business, or non-profits to combine, allowing them to negotiate as a collective (buying in quantity always reduces the cost) to buy healthcare insurance? “NO!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support the ability for individuals, interested in purchasing through a health insurance collective, to contribute additional funds, tax-free, to help those in need of health coverage? “NO!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support the ability of the individual to contribute greater sums to THEIR flex plans, tax-free, and allow those flex-plans to roll over from year to year (tax-free). “NO!”
Does Congresswoman Porter defend your individual liberty, and allow you to determine your own healthcare fate? “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”
But let’s be fair, Congresswoman Porter doesn’t always say no. For example:
Does Congresswoman support a 2000+ page healthcare bill that she initially did not read, and to date many of her colleagues still have not read? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that Nancy Pelosi recently supported by saying – “You have to wait until the bill passes to know what is in it?” “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a healthcare bill that directly or indirectly uses taxpayer dollars to fund abortion? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that will force healthcare rationing on all Americans? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that will cut $500 billion dollars from Medicare? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that would provide healthcare coverage to at least 8 million illegal aliens? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that the CBO says will raise income taxes to 43% (from 35%) on many Americans? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that will see the Capitals Gains taxes increase from 15% to 22.5%, in an already troubled economy? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that will force a $2,000.00 dollar increase in the average health insurance premium (according to Heritage Foundation based on the CBO analysis)? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that will FORCE people to buy insurance they don’t need or want that would cost over $8,500.00 dollars? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that would allow the IRS further intrusion into your life, by making them the enforcement arm to ensure that the mandatory healthcare insurance is being met by individuals? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that fines those who do not purchase health insurance 2.5% of their income? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a healthcare bill that also mandates prison sentences should an individual not purchase healthcare and fail to pay the penalty fine? “YES!”
But guess what, she will make sure you have complete healthcare coverage when you are in prison!
Does Congresswoman Porter support a healthcare bill that taxes medical devices, such as pace makers, hearing aids, wheel-chairs, and artificial limbs? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a healthcare bill that completes a government takeover and funding of all federal student-loan programs (what the hell does that have to do with healthcare?)? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that will be passed without actually being voted on? “YES!”
Does Congresswoman Porter support a bill that the overwhelming majority of her continents do not support? “YES!”
If this healthcare bill passes, with the help of Congresswoman Porter, the United States Congress will seize control of not only the best healthcare system in the world, but a free market entity that represents 1/6 of our economy.
If this bill passes, which when combined with the masses takeovers of other industries, such as the financial institutes and auto manufactures, Congresswoman Porter will be on record as to permitting the United States Government seizing close to 50% of our economy.
When a government talks about controlling the economy and business, make no mistake about it, what they are really talking about is controlling people. This is a concept our country, and most of our neighbors, are ill-prepared to handle, let alone support. And it is contrariety to the founding principles that made America the most prosperous nation on the planet.
“All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent.” – Thomas Jefferson
We cannot remain silent, and we cannot be part of a generation that allowed this to happen!
A vote on healthcare will most likely come this week. Waiting until November will not help us now. November will give us a chance to restore sensibility in DC; but today, and tomorrow, and all of the days until the next election require our vigilance.
We need to make sure that the likes of Congresswoman Porter, Speaker Pelosi, and Majority Leader Reid, feel us breathing down their necks, see us taking to the streets in opposition to bad ideas, and they need to hear us not only in resistance, but in support of intellectual solutions that serve us and not enslave us!
And how do we stay engaged:
You support groups such as the AFP, help give them the muscle to resist.
Calls are nice but telegrams, letters, and visits to our Representative offices are better! (do not go in there as a group, but go in there one at a time.
Be an advocate. Get your friends and family engaged.
Help candidates who not only oppose those representatives that support such measures as this healthcare bill, but candidates that are prepared to offer real solutions and reforms that will help New Hampshire families, and not hurt them
Support such endeavors as Frank Guinta’s healthcare petition, and Congressman Steve King’s Declaration for Healthcare Independence.
Right letters to the editor or call talk radio. Don’t insult, simply state facts.
Stay informed and be ready to engage on principles and fact. Visit sites such as Heritage Foundation and the Hudson Institute. Arm yourself with the truth, because our liberal friends know so much that just isn’t so.
In closing I want to bring you back to the beginning of my remarks. I want to bring you back to Gettysburg and Littleround Top. When we last left Joshua Chamberlain and his men they were outnumbered, exhausted, and out of ammo. The situation looked hopeless, in many ways where you and I found ourselves now.
Chamberlain knew what we know today, surrender is not an option; failure cannot not be the end result. Against all odds, Colonial Chamberlain rallied his troops and gave them the only order he could…….fix bayonets!
Chamberlain and his men did something their enemy did not expect……… they charged down that hill yelling and screaming as one united force. I can only imagine what the enemy must have thought.
When the cause of liberty needed a victory, a small band of brothers from Maine gave us one. But it was their destiny to win that battle, as it is our destiny to win this one, because they had something their enemies did not possess………. They had the high ground and they were fighting for a principle greater than themselves.
Ladies and gentleman, the opposition has underestimated your determination and your resolve. We have the high ground, and our principles are worthy of our defense. So I say to tonight…..fix bayonets ……………charge!
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Don’t Like Tea Parties, Try Coffee!
Leave it to liberals to create a counter movement in which their symbol is a beverage topped with frothy milk, and whose motto is “espresso yourself.”
Lacking even one original bone in their vegan induced, emaciated bodies, this group of beret wearing neoprogressives have decided that they need to stand up “against” the tea party movement by writing a coffee manifesto!
The founder of the “movement,” Annabel Park, a documentary film maker (big surprise, the perfect vocation for the founder of such a group) even offered a motivating rallying cry:
"let's start a coffee party ... smoothie party. red bull party. anything but tea. geez. ooh how about cappuccino party? that would really p!ss 'em off bec it sounds elitist ..."
Gee you think, elitist? Where do I sign up?
Bruce Maiman wrote an interesting blog piece, in which he suggested some items that should be part of the coffee party planks:
Lacking even one original bone in their vegan induced, emaciated bodies, this group of beret wearing neoprogressives have decided that they need to stand up “against” the tea party movement by writing a coffee manifesto!
The founder of the “movement,” Annabel Park, a documentary film maker (big surprise, the perfect vocation for the founder of such a group) even offered a motivating rallying cry:
"let's start a coffee party ... smoothie party. red bull party. anything but tea. geez. ooh how about cappuccino party? that would really p!ss 'em off bec it sounds elitist ..."
Gee you think, elitist? Where do I sign up?
Bruce Maiman wrote an interesting blog piece, in which he suggested some items that should be part of the coffee party planks:
* No sleeping until after the midterm elections
* YOU TYPE EVERYTHING IN CAPITAL LETTERS
* Ability to pass people on the highway without driving in your car
* Rename your kids "Cappuccino," "Americano" and "Mocha Latte"
* Tendency to lick window panes at Starbucks
* All videos watched in fast-forward
* Can only stand still during an earthquake
* Pulse can only be measured using the National Debt Clock
* You do 20 miles on the treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in
* You're shaking like Jim Bunning at an unemployment office
* You don't sweat, you percolate
Can’t wait for the first meeting when they breakout the bongo drums and unveil the new group flag, which just happens to feature a picture of Juan Valdez and his burro.
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